ramble

Trains to Brazil

And to those of you who moan your lives through one day to the next
Well, let them take you next
Can’t you live and be thankful you’re here?
See it could be you tomorrow, next year

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPI3jxAhG9E?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0&w=500&h=375]

It’s what I want, that’s easy.

It’s getting it that’s complicated.

Lost post

I was going to write a post about some things you obviously are having a good time tweeting about, dearest mother of my child.

But then I decided it wasn’t worth my time; it would be better spent learning new stuff so I can provide something good to him in the future.

You know he loves bathtubs full of warm water, right?

Back

So we’s gots internets at home now.

Still around

Yeah so I have this place a bit abandoned. I’m waiting for Cablemas to setup internet at home so I can waste my time in a good and proper manner.

It’s not that easy to get rid of me these days… no it’s not.

At 1050 on 2009/01/10 I shall be leaving Tijuana for the foreseeable future.

Sand trickles out of my soul…

New Year, continued

I got robbed. Couple of hobos got me from the back when crossing a bridge. I’d always looked at them with sorrow but now… now I look at them with distrust.

Kill ‘em all, I say. Kill ‘em all.

I’m also thinking Tijuana is kicking me out, with assaults on multiple fronts; I’m going for strategic retreat to fight on a new front.

Incoming reality disfunction.

New Year

Incredibly, I spent it amongst other people at La Mezcalera instead of alone at basecamp. I wanted to be somewhere else, either at a big hotel or in another city. Sadly I couldn’t spare the resources for either party.

I guess I enjoyed myself a bit. A couple of beers, a mezcal. Someone got out a laptop for the countdown and that was that.

New Year's at La Mezcalera

A perfect stranger wished me a good year too! That got a smile out of me. A real smile at that, the sort that goes up to your eyes. Not the crooked one I use to humor people.

Went for tacos after that, then went home and watched a movie. The best part? Not tired at all and ready for the weekend.

Secundaria

Here was a post that revealed too much about my current emotional state. All I’m going to say is when I look in the mirror I see no one there.

Tears

Today my son broke my heart.

I cried in front of him.

Of invitations to the good times

Over the past months I’ve realized I need an active invitation in order to enjoy being at a bar, pub, disco or house. If I arrive at a place and find someone friendly there that counts as an invitation too; the other person will usually provide a pathway to enjoyment.

I got this theory since I first read the Artemis Fowl series. It’s a stretch, yes, but I’ve realized it applies well to my nights out.

Ennui, as of November 9th

I don’t really have a passion for anything these times. Days pass in a blur, punctuated by brief periods of fleeting happiness occurring only on the weekends.

I write this on a calafia, feeling the cool wind move my hair across my closed eyes. When I open them everything has a bluish tint to it and hair strands untangle themselves from eyelashes. Yet I don’t feel depressed.

It probably has to do with a thoroughly unsatisfying end to a good weekend; or the fact I didn’t get my morning coffee.

Sleep

No matter how many times I try, it is likely I will never be able to go to sleep before 00:00 if I’m running on eight hours of sleep.

On occasion I have been able to… usually after days (and nights) where I haven’t slept, if at all.

The proof is in this writing. Made it at 01:00.

So

This will be my place on the internet while I get something going for myself. Thing is… I’ll do my posting in English as I’m slowly losing my fight against thought processes in Spanish.

Need to put a stop to them.